Wednesday, July 13, 2005

Make It Funky, Doctor Seuss

Since B is 2, he has hit Dr. Seuss stage. His two favorite Seuss' right now are Green Eggs and Ham and Ten Apples Up on Top. It's fun reading these things as adults, because Seuss, well, he was apparently a strange one. Let's take Ten Apples up on Top. It starts off normal enough with a lion, a dog, and a tiger having a competition for how many apples they can put on their head. But soon the lion and dog are breaking into some bear's apartment by walking on electrical wires. They open her fridge and grab apples and milk and start drinking them and tossing the apples on their heads as they skate around her place. She runs in with a mop to smack em to get them to leave, so they run out, pushing and knocking over a bear kid not once but twice. The bear town folk join in chasing them across the countryside carrying, literally, baseball bats, crowbars, etc. And I'm sorry, they aren't going for the apples with a crowbar, they are going for the lion's head. We are about to have a mob scene. Eventually they all run smack into a huge cart full of apples and somehow when the apples land on everyone's head, they all make peace. You gotta love the crime spree he has in his children's lit. We need to have a Grand Theft Auto: Seuss Edition.

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